What defines you? A question on the porch…

 This question is so hard. I find it hard to see myself. To see who I am. To define myself. I am going to be 72 the end of April. Now there is a definition. I have aged much more quickly than I thought I would. I thought I would at least be able to define myself by this advanced age. Life flies by doing all the things that must be done to support a family day to day. To raise children. Being astounded by grandchildren. Working at a relationship. 

Define myself. Let me try. 

I read. I love books. Literature. 

I am low energy. I do not want to use up my store of energy on things that are not important to me. I enjoy spending time on these things: Temple Run. Hidden Objects. Jigsaw puzzles. No TV, few movies. Sitting on my old front porch. Reading. 

One of my favorite activities is having conversations with my teens. Playing Cards against Humanity starts all sorts of talks. They are bright, interesting people. They read. I love that. 

I am not great at friends. I like other people to carry a conversation. I am satisfied with the company of my family. I love my nieces and nephews. 

I could live in my one room camper. I am not in love with house work. I can be lazy if I have time.

I am caring for my very ill husband. I have somehow stayed upbeat. I have done things I did not think I could do. Blow snow for us and for two of my neighbors. Complete care of our wild dog. Out every morning around 7 to do her duty. Garbage duty. Lawn care. House cleaning. Vacuuming. Caring for my husband who always had boundless energy. Who was a full partner in every way. 

I still dream of travel. Of art museums. Of the beach.

So, did I define myself? I’m still not sure if I actually see who I really am. What kind of person am I? Did I meet my full potential as a woman? 

I will look back on this blog to see if this all makes sense. 

I read Remarkably Bright Creatures in February. Very good. I am listening to Demon Copperhead by Barbara Kinsolver. So very good!

Closing my rings on the porch…

 I was given an Apple Watch for Christmas. For some reason those exersize rings have inspired me to, well, exersize! I have only missed a couple of days since Christmas. I am still doing Strength training for older people. I had to go down to 3 lb weights-it is hard for me but getting easier. I do FIIT. Or something. I really like these stretchy moves. I want to add yoga and kick boxing. The dance is too hard on my old feet. I am so proud of myself. 

Working on 2023 Pop Sugar Challenge. I have not liked all my choices so far. Weather Girl and Beach Read were a little too fluffy for my taste. I am enjoying Remarkably Bright Creatures. It is a Read With Jenna pic. I like her books. I am ready for another Shuggie Bain or The Sentence or Mr Loverman to knock my socks off! 

I love my crazy little dog so much. She is so attached to me. Follows me around. Sticks with me through excersize classes. Waits while I dress. Our other two dogs were devoted to Ivan. Bella, has picked me.

 

Read Harder 2022 on the porch…

     1. Read a biography of an author you admire~Tell Me a     Story by Cassandra King Conroy🦒 

2. Read a book set in a bookstore~The Sentence by Louise Erdrich~1/29/22 ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
3. Read any book from the Woman’s Prize-Shortlist/Longlist/Winner~Fleishman is in Trouble by Taffy Brodesser-Akner 2020 longlist (library)⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️7/31/22
4. Read a book by a POC in any genre that’s about joy not trauma~Honey Girl by Morgan Rogers ⭐️⭐️⭐️8/14/22 
5. Read an anthology featuring diverse voices~Disability Visability edited by Alice Wong~1/11/22 ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
6. Read a non fiction YA comic~They Called US Enemy by George Takei~1/06/22 ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
7. Read a romance where at least one of the protagonists is over 40~ Our Souls at Night by Kent Haruf ~1/9/22⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
8. Read a classic by a POC~The Count of Monte Christo by Alexander Dumas 🦒
9. Read the book that’s been on your TBR the longest.
10. Read a political thriller by a marginalized author  (BIPOC, LGBTQIA+)~The Sympathizer by Viet Thanh Nguyen~10/28/2022 ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
11. Read a book with an asexual and/or aromantic character~Let’s Talk About Love by Claire Kann⭐️⭐️⭐️11/15/22
12. Read an entire poetry collection~Time is a Mother by Ocean Vuong ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️11/3/2022
13. Read an adventure story by a BIPOC author~Blacktop Wasteland by S A Cosby or Razorblade Tears~2/9/22⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️(kindle)
14. Read a book whose movie or TV adaptation you’ve seen (but haven’t read the book)~ Maid by Stephanie Land~Netflix series Maid(kindle) 1/2 ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
15. Read a new to you literary magazine~The Paris Review Issue 240 Summer 2022~9/13/22⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
16. Read a book recommended by a friend with different reading taste~Maureen by Rachel Joyce🦒
17. Read a memoir by somyeone who is trans or non binary~Dear Senthuran by Aweake Emezi 🦒
18. Read a “Best Writing_of the Year” book for a topic and year of your choice. Burning by Megha Majundha 🦒 Best American Short Stories of the Year maybe 2021?
19. Read a horror novel by a BIPOC author~Certain Dark Things by Sylvia Moreno-Garcia ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️🎧11/8/2022
20. Read an award-winning book from the year you were born~The Town by Conrad Richter🦒
21. Read a queer retelling of a classic of the canon, fairytale, folklore or myth~Ash by Malinda Lo ⭐️⭐️⭐️8/17/22
22. Read a history about a period you know little about~Matrix by Lauren Groff (12th Century)⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️2/24/22
23. Read a book by a disabled author~Sitting pretty by Rebekah Taussig⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️9/5/22
24. Pick a challenge from any of the previous years’ challenges to repeat ~Real Life by Brandon Taylor~⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️3/11/2022 All POV characters are POC. 2017

           🌟The Grass Beneath My Feet by SA Cosby~ short

story.     

             Anthony Award ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️2/4/22 OMG     

              Southern Noir

I did not read 5 of my challenges. 😬 I started the Count of Monte Christo. Did not finish. I plan on reading 3 of the other 4. Not The Town by Conrad Richter.

Pop Sugar 2022 finished with one day to spare…

 Pop Sugar 2022~fin

I did not finish PS Advanced for the first time in many years. I had trouble concentrating on my reading. Pan Can has taken my joy in life. I live with fear for my hubby. Seeing him suffer is so overwhelming. But this is what I have. The Sentence by Louise Erdrich, Crying in H Mart and The Matrix by Lauren Groff were my  favorite reads this year. These books set me apart from mainstream readers. I can’t read the best sellers by Colleen Hoover or Taylor J Reid. Just no. Guided by Pop Sugar and Read Harder I read a diverse number of books. A few were not great but they met the challenge criteria. I have enjoyed Audible this year. I read 51 books in 2022. I have a great TBR planned for 2023. I will be 72 in April 2023. Feeling mortal.

1. A book published in 2022~You Made a Fool of Death With Your Beauty by Akweake Emezi(May 2022)⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️6/29/22
2. A book set on a train, plane or cruise ship~Float Plan by Trish Doller(sailboat)⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️1/7/22
3. A book set in or about a non patriarchal society~The Matrix by Lauren Groff🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟2/24/22 Get thee to a nunnery
4. A book with a tiger on the cover or “tiger” in the title~The Night Tiger by Yangtze Choo ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️11/2/2022
5. A sapphic book~Last Night at the Telegraph Club by Malinda Lo⭐️⭐️⭐️5/30/2022
6. A book by a Latinx author~Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas 🌟🌟🌟4/20/22 (Latinx, trans author)
7. A book with an  anomomatopoeia in the title~Clap When You Land by Elizabeth Acevedo ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️2/24/22
8. A book with a protagonist who uses a mobility aid~Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zevin ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️2/16/22 (Sam-Cane-prothsetic foot)
9. A book about a “found family”~The House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune(overdrive)~⭐️⭐️⭐️1/9/22
10. An Anisfield-Wolf book award winner~A Plague of Doves by Louise Erdrich (2009) 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟12/17/2022
11. A book-tok# recommendation~People We Meet on Vacation by Emily Henry⭐️⭐️⭐️1/6/22
12. A book about the afterlife~ Where the Dead Sit Talking by Brandon Hobson⭐️⭐️⭐️10/13/22
13. A book set in the 1980’s~Tuesday Night’s in 1980 by Molly Prentiss 🌟🌟🌟🌟12/8/22
14. A book with cutlery on the cover or in the title~Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner~🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟3/24/22
15. A book with a Pacific Islander author~Sharks in the Time of Saviors by Kawai Strong Washburn~🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟12/6/2022
16. A book about witches~The Witchcraft of Salem Village by Shirley Jackson🌟🌟🌟🌟12/18/2022
17. A book becoming a movie or TV series in 2022~Death on the Nile by Agatha Christie~🌟🌟🌟🌟11/6/2022 February 2022 movie
18. A romance novel by a BIPOC author~Honey Girl by Morgan Rogers ⭐️⭐️⭐️8/14/22
19. Pop A book that takes place during your favorite season~Real Lif(e)by  Brandon Taylor(fall)~🎧⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️3/11/22
20. A book whose title begins with the last letter of your previous read~(E)mily and Einstein by Linda Francis Lee⭐️⭐️⭐️3/3/22
21. A book about a band or musical group~Rotten: No Irish, No Blacks, No Dogs by John Lydon~The Final Revival of Opal and Nev by Dawnie~🌟🌟🌟🌟12/1/22
22. A book with a character on the ace spectrum~Let’s  Talk About Love by Claire Kann⭐️⭐️⭐️11/15/22
23. A book with a recipe in it~Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner ~☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️3/24/22~jatjuk pine nut porridge
24. A book you can read in one sitting~Float Plan by Trish Dollar ~⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️1/7/2022
25. A book about a secret~Book Lovers by Emily Henry⭐️⭐️⭐️6/15/22
26. A book with a misleading title~Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟4/13/22🚀
27. A Hugo award winner~This is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar Max Gladstone~🌟🌟🌟12/11/2022
28. A book set during a holiday~The Santa Suit by Mary Kay Andrews ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️2/1/22 (kindle)
29. A different book by an author you read in 2021~The Sentence by Louise Erdrich (The Night Watchman)⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️1/29/22 🎧 
30. A book with the name of a board game in the title~Fleishman is in Trouble by Taffy Brodesser-Akner⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️7/31/22
31. A book featuring a man made disaster~Sea of Tranquility by Emily St John Mandel🌟🌟🌟🌟12/30/22
32. A book with a quote from your favorite author on the cover or Amazon page~Lucy By The Sea by  Elizabeth Strout ”The depth, complexity, and love contained in these pages are a miraculous achievement.”—Ann Patchett⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️9/22/22
33. A social horror book~The Only Good Indians by Stephan  Graham-Jones ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️11/12/2022
34. A book set in Victorian times ~The Return of the Native by Thomas Hardy⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️6/6/2022
35. A book with a constellation on the cover or in the title~The Night Tiger by Yangze Choo⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️11/2/2022 (4 & 35)
36. A book you know nothing about~The Flatshare by Beth O’Leary ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/27/22
37. A book about gender identity~Gender Queer by Maia Kobabe ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️10/13/2022
38. A book featuring a party~The Guest List by Lucy Foley⭐️⭐️⭐️2/18/22
39. An own voices# SFF book~Certain Dark Things by Sylvia Moreno-Garcia~⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️11/8/2022
40. A book that fulfills your favorite prompt from a past Pop Sugar Challenge~A Calling for Charlie Barnes by Joshua Ferris (2017 An audio book) ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️9/5/22

Book Challenge 2022 on the porch…

 It has been a rough year on the porch. My reading has suffered along with my daily life. Caregivers don’t have as much time to read. I have struggled to focus. Pan Can takes up a lot of space. My hubby has reached 18 months in his cancer journey. He has remained positive through it all. Chemo side effects. Several bad falls. ER visits. Trauma of illness. Somehow we have enjoyed the last year, made each day as good as we could make it. Football games. A visit to The Big House. Family visits. FaceTime graduations. Enjoying our backyard all summer and fall.  I digress.

Books I read in 2022

I still have to finish two more books to complete the Pop Sugar Challenge. I’m not even close on the Advanced list. I am about 3/4 of the way finished with the Read Harder Challenge. My first time ever not finishing Read Harder. I’m dissapointed in myself. I hope to finish early 2023 while starting the 2023 lists. I have already started choosing books for next year. I love compiling the lists almost as much as reading the books. I think I am officially a book nerd. 📚📚📚

This is what 71 looks like on the porch…

 So. I googled, what does a 71 year old woman look like. Pictures of a few 71 year old models. Make up and hair included. I googled bathing suit for a 70 year old women. Hoping for a little camouflage. The bathing suits were worn by, maybe, 40 year old models. So I took a selfie of me. I am 71. I realized I don’t have an accurate vision of myself. Not one thing is retouched here. Not that anyone would think these photos were touched up. I have on eye make up and lip gloss. Sunscreen. No foundation. My neck! Oh, my. I can see my fine and not so fine lines. I just wonder why it is so hard to Google a 71 year old woman? This is me being so honest about how I look. I’m not ready to be perfectly honest about how it feels to be a 71 year old woman…

Lucy by the Sea…

 I just finished Lucy by the Sea by Elizabeth Strout. I could not put this book down. I had to stop reading to sleep late one night. That has not happened to me in ages. I needed a book like this one. I am behind on my book challenges for 2022. No books have excited me as in other years. A slump or the circumstances of my life. Pop Sugar Challenge #32

My review: 

I loved this book. Every word of it. It was the first book in a long time that I could not put down. Lucy is a woman of practicality and honesty. She sees herself as she is. Also I feel like I have gone through this time in her life with her. The pandemic. Aging. Her daughter’s trials. Losing friends and lovers. I am nearly her age. “It is a gift in this life that we do not know what awaits us.”-Lucy Barton

#NetGalley #ElizabethStrout #LucybytheSea

Thank you to #NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review this amazing ARC.